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Am I over reacting or is Microsoft/Xbox under reacting?

Hello,

Recently I was gaming and I made a joke over mic and these three guys picked up I was female instantly. One of them began threating to SA me while the others called me slurs. The whole experience was rather awful but I was recording at the time.

I sent a report into xbox, when I didn't hear I emailed them with the videos to which I basically got scowled for not using their in game reporting system and explained the difference between harassment and competitive gaming banter but they said they'd look into it.

In the end they closed the gaming ticket without telling me what happened but it's obvious no one got banned as I checked and they were online.

The game company they were playing with only banned the one that made threats on that game.

I then went to xboxs live chat because I think it's a super serious threat and there is video footage and they escalated it and I've heard nothing. Should I just drop it at this point?

I just am feeling pretty defeated, I can handle being called names in game or slurs but these people we're telling me in graphic detail how they were going to R*** my dead corpse over and over again.

I don't know if I'm taking it to personal, or if this is really bad and there is a massive under reaction happening by xbox?

Thankyou for your responses

Edit: I'm not sure if I'm allowed to add this but I posed it to twitter, any traction would help (I dont want likes or follows, just traction on this one post https://twitter.com/GigglingGhosty/status/1784560524447125511

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25 Comments

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  1. If you blast their ass on Twitter (or other platforms since twitter is where this shit thrives now) it might force them to address the issue. Maybe attach proof of the ticket and whatever response they gave.

    Upload it where you can too, the more exposure of this abuse *being ignored* the better. M$ not doing anything (the bare minimum banning them) is them making a choice.

    I’m sorry you went through that. I don’t think I could stomach watching it myself but it sounds horrific. And yes it’s an underreaction, especially since you had freaking proof. Suddenly glad I don’t have an xbox tbh

  2. These sorts of interactions is why I stopped playing online many years ago. One guy ended up finding out where I lived, this was early 2000s.

    You are most definitely not over reacting, especially with how quickly people can find you irl these days. This is a serious threat, it doesn’t matter if these guys are on the other side of the world, any threat like this should be taken very seriously.

    I would do what someone else suggested and blast them all over Twitter, both Xbox and each one of those bellends names. If Xbox won’t protect you, you have to protect yourself. Shout it from the rooftops.We don’t owe anyone the courtesy of time when we are being abused!

    I’m really sorry that this still happens all these years later. To any men reading this, pls start calling out your mates when they do this bullshit, staying silent or just stopping playing with them isn’t enough, you need to tell them it isn’t okay, even if you are the only guy shouting it. We can’t change this on our own, we need the solidarity of men.

  3. They’re definitely under reacting, and I think it’s a great idea to keep pursuing it, if you want to. This could be an issue within their entire review system, or it could be 1 or 2 shitty employees who are misogynistic. Either way, that definitely needs to change. Edit: I just read you’re reply to someone else and that man at xbox who replied to your email is absolutely wrong, that really makes me mad, he should not be in his position if he thinks rape threats are competitive banter. Wtf!

  4. I would find the CEO email online. Satya Nadella it’s an easy Google and tell him you’ve been given death and rape threats and his company won’t take you seriously and help protect you or other women and you hope it’s just some bad staff members and not a systematic problem.

    If he gives you the same response or ignores you then id be blasting it over social media to shame Microsoft. Make it clear their reactions are sexist and shameful.

    I did this with PlayStation once and got a very fast response and they were so apologetic.

  5. If you are in the USA you can report this to the FBI. They take death threats over the internet VERY seriously.

    You just need to show/send them your recordings, they’ll do the legwork of tracking the real people from the usernames.

  6. You’re not taking it “Too personal” cause what they did is DAMN personal. I’m a victim of SA myself and I’m really sorry you went through this. Microsoft is a POS for not doing much here.. I can’t imagine how traumatizing that experience would be for you 🙁

  7. Did you record the video with your phone? Because this could be the reason why they hesitate with a ban.

    I play on xbox for a few years now. And i got players banned for far less. Got a even email notifications that the reported players is banned and they even thanked me for reporting. They normally act very quick on that.

    I even got players banned for calling me bitch in a text message.

    Using the xbox notification system is the important difference i think. Dunno what you can do now. But next time (lets hope there is no next time) do this: Parties & chats > Report in-game voice chat > Save voice chat.

  8. They’re really just underreacting. I had a chat with them (MS/Xbox) about Sea of Thieves and how my ID showing in this game calls for harassment both as a streamer and as a marginalized person. It was so bad I didn’t want to stream the game anymore.

    They told me the harassment was my fault for choosing to broadcast my game play and by streaming it I consented to the harassment and then Sea of Thieves and the company behind it blocked me from Twitter without me messaging them at any point directly.

  9. Thats ridiculous yet i got a fricken 2 week ban for saying cuz words to some guys who were talking smack to me, all because they were mad i wouldnt give them my modded car on gta even tho i told them my friend had more and could sell them one smh. Xbox/Microsoft seems sexist af!

  10. On Xbox they ban you from comms for a set amount of time. They won’t permanently ban you from playing the games you have or stop you from going online. So if you checked if they were banned by seeing if they were online, they could still go online, but they cannot participate in the any in-game chat system or the Xbox voice chat or messages.

  11. I second blasting them on Twitter, that might be a bit more helpful for you or reporting this to the FBI. 

    I hope they receive some major karma, no one should be able to get away with such blatantly hateful harassment/behavior. You  are clearly in the right here.

    Im so sorry for what you’ve dealt with 🩷🩷🩷🩷

  12. I am so sorry that happened to you OP. This is literally why I only play single player games. Ugh.

    Concerning XBOX‘ reaction, I might be able to give some insights (Not to defend the „not doing something“ at all, but here to give an explanation).

    I worked for multiple companies who have this kind of in-app reporting system and it is really crucial that people use it instead of writing customer support or use any other way to report.

    The reason: big tech companies have a very well thought out trust and safety process including a massive rule book which kind of violation is followed by which penalty. The only people who are 100% familiar with these rules are the TnS people (not customer support, not community managers, not anyone else)- for many good reasons:

    – TnS rules should not be common knowledge. Not even within the company. If people knew details they would leak and users would 100% find work arounds & loop holes in no time

    – They have to make sure to be impartial and always give the same „sentence“ for the same violation. Someone outside of TnS with no special training (like a community manager can and should not make such a decision).

    – If TnS let customer support staff influence a moderation decision, they risk that the customer / user sues their ass

    You would not believe how often big companies with an online user base get sued over moderation decisions or account terminations.
    It is actually insane. And what’s even worse is that a lot of courts decide in favor of the user (who harassed people in a way OP described), because “big bad company” hurr durr.

    So long story short to answer OPs initial question: No, OP – you’re not overreacting. Those people are trash and their accounts should be banned for life. Is Microsoft underreacting – yes, but there’s a reason for it.

  13. Many reporting systems aren’t designed to keep players safe, they’re designed to protect the company from liability and bad PR. They have lukewarm reactions because they are just as worried about being branded as infringing on speech as they are about being branded as toxic.

    That said, the whole system is massively f*cked up and patriarchal.

  14. Aleena: this is why i don’t join random parties and hardly ever VC with anyone i don’t trust and am very block-happy. before i quit playing on Xbox i had north of probably 2k people on my block list, which is funny because the xbox ui can only display 999. it wasn’t ever made to work with 4 digit numbers. by the time i quit, i had blocked around 60-70% of all the people i would get into sessions with on GTA and plenty others. reporting VC’s doesn’t work because microsoft support doesn’t work, nor does any of their stuff. only thing that does is leaving the party or VC and then proceeding to kick their ass in the game and make them angry, let their own anger and self hatred and stuff destroy them from the inside. one hope is they’ll end up being forced to message you and say their hateful trash that way. best method i found is to set chat filtering to hide content that’s really bad, like set it to the lowest level and to only apply to chat requests, then if it’s hidden, read it (you can click it to reveal so no worries there) and report it appropriately bc the auto filtering system will instantly give them a ban. you need to force them into that system and use that to your advantage. even egg them on by saying “oh i don’t understand, i don’t speak random letters” so they’re forced to spell it out properly in anger so the auto-filters can recognize it. also you don’t even have to unhide the content, just report for harassment or whatever, and it’ll still moderate against them. saves your mental health that way, and ensures actual legitimate consequences. you’ll get a generic “thanks for making the xbox live community safer” message from xbox within around 3 minutes after the report and auto-ban.

    hope this helps going forward.

    — a random transbian that learned to use xbox systems to my advantage

  15. I 100% don’t think you’re overreacting. What’s the point in MS even having the facility to get in touch with them and the option to ban people if they’re not going to swing the hammer for stuff like this? I’ve retweeted you, hopefully it helps at least a little bit! It’s so frustrating when there’s so little you can do, it feels like banging your head against a brick wall.

  16. What game were you playing? I know reporting for slurs/racism gets the most percentage of people banned on games like Overwatch and COD. That’s what I usually report for cuz it’s taken the most seriously. (And in all realness, men like this would probably start calling out racial slurs to get any kind of attention anyways)

    Hopefully if you were live it was at least fun to shit talk them and make fun of them with your chat. Last time something like this happened to me (when I was literally playing with a partner) the idiot asked me how old I was, then how big my feet were, then that he could probably fit them in his mouth, then when I got my first period!!! Like ????????

  17. Not that it changes much, as Microsoft should definitely be dealing with it, but was it a Microsoft game? Have you tried reaching out to the game’s developers?

    EDIT: Nvm. I see further below you state it was SoT and Rare did respond.

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